Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Worthy of Love


I don`t know.

Maybe I`m too old.

Too fat.

Too uncompromising.

Too untrusting.

Too far gone.


And I don`t like when my emotions talk like that.

Because I know

I`m still young at heart.

With a few added pounds.

That compromising means settling for less than

  what I know is right.

Trust needs to be earned.

And while there is breath left

no one is ever too far gone.


My Lord, my King of Kings,

You thought me worthy enough to give

Your Life.

Help me to see everyone as you see them.

We all seem to be worthy of Love.

Sunday, October 29, 2006

Radio Contest


Happy weekend,everyone! What`s left of it anyhow.

Thank you, Jenny of Sunshine Expressions... for this inspiring tag. Love it!

What happened on Friday was a first for me. I won a radio contest! I was at work at the bank, in the drive up listening to the radio when a trivia question came up. So I Googled it real quick, called in - and won. lol And the prize is cool - 5 free car washes.

My sore throat has cleared up, but the head cold is still hanging on. I slept most of the late afternoon and evening yesterday. I felt better after that.

Tonight I have to be at a covered dish dinner at church. We`re having a guest speaker.

My latest bargain purchase is a tote bag I got at Dollar Tree for a buck! $ 


It`s a perfect size for what I usually take along to work: A book, Nutri-Grain Bar, and a banana.  :)

So I`m going to read some journals now and answer some emails.


Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Candles and Macs



I woke up today sneezing and sniffling and with a sore throat. I guess that explains why I felt so blah yesterday. Nonetheless, it was a fairly busy day for me. I got up early to go to Walmart to do a bit of grocery shopping. Okay, I bought a pair of jeans and a sweater, too. :>)   I hate to admit to buying clothes there, but the jeans are reasonable and I actually found a pair that fits good. Most of mine have a flair, which I love, only to find out that`s not the style now. Now the thing is tapered at the bottom. I asked my daughter last week when we were on vacation if my jeans, which had some flair at the bottom looked stupid now. She said, "No, mom, they look good. I mean it`s not like you`re 20. "   Uh.....thanks. I think.  Anyhow, I also got a greyish hooded sweater. Very pretty.

Note to self > Never throw out or give away clothes. They always come back in style eventually. ( SAVE FLAIRED JEANS )

So then I go to work. I was scheduled in the drive - thru. ( I work in a bank. )  So, figuring it would be relatively quiet, I buy 2 magazines to take with me so I can read when it`s slow. It turns out I was in the lobby all day, we were VERY short staffed and I barely had time to breath all day, let alone pop my Halls cough drops! Geesh.

One of our girls got promoted and went to another branch. She got everyone a goodbye gift, but I didn`t know this because I was on vacation last week. I was surprised when I got to work to see a lovely gift bag waiting for me. I got the most beautiful candle from her. Check it out:


The green pieces of glass on the top sparkle with the candlelight. I love it and it smells like Honeydew!

Being a bank teller is a lot like being a bar tender. We chat with everyone, hear their problems, talk about our kids,our lives. I swear, I should have a cup sitting there marked TIPS. ( One time at another bank I worked in, we used to laugh because this one teller, for some reason, was the one every person opened up to. Customers would stand there forever telling her their woes. We put a sign at her window: The Doctor Is IN. ) It was hilarious. ( guess ya had to be there. ) Anyhow, I was chatting with a customer, telling him about the juice Corey spilled in her Mac computer, and he says take a hair dryer to it. So I talked to her a little bit ago and told her. She tried it and it worked! lol! Another prayer answered. The computer is working!!!!

Note to self  > Think twice before letting daughter buy expensive toys.

LOL, in all honesty, she almost had to buy it to do her fashion designs on at school.

By the way, I have decided, after my big pillow making extravaganza, that I want a sewing machine. I have no clue how to use one, but this seems to be the year that I`m learning all kinds of new things. I once stapled a shirt together in Home Ec class in junior high school and got a big fat F on it. lol. Teacher couldn`t take a joke, I guess. Watch some of my old friends be reading this entry...How much you wanna bet they`ll email me and snicker about it? They have never let me forget that. Never. We`ll see who`s laughing when Penny`s Pillow Factory makes it`s first cool million. Ha ha.

I`m off to find something for my poor sore throat. :/




Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Tired Tuesday


Today has been sort of an "off " day for me and I`m not sure why. No particular reason. It was cold and dreary with a bit of rain.

I made the hour`s drive to the Cleveland Clinic. I feel like I could drive it with my eyes closed by now, I`ve made so many trips there! I received a good report. :)  My doctor says to me, in reference to this whole leukemia deal, " Penny, you have sailed through this. I know it doesn`t always seem like it, but trust me, you have!"

I suppose that`s true, compared to how bad it could have been. Some of the side effects are caused by the combination of meds and chemo, which lower the immune system considerably. When I was first hospitalized, no one could come and see me if they had a cold or were sick in any way. If a family member was sick, but had to visit me to bring me something, they had to wear a mask. Once I finally returned home, I couldn`t eat at a buffet or any place like that because of germs. I couldn`t eat fruit unless it was washed thoroughly with soap and water.

I`ve had enough antibiotics in me to last a lifetime! I was in the hospital over Christmas with pneumonia. In January I got shingles and what a nightmare that was! I had to be hospitalized again. For a short time, all the steroids I took made me diabetic and I had to learn to give myself shots to control it. ( That lasted maybe 2 months. ) Yet all in all, I have sailed through this. I`m not being facetious. I`m truly thankful that it wasn`t worse. Being relatively young and healthy to begin with also helped. And let`s not forget a ton of prayer!

So I guess what prompted me to bring all this up and talk about it is because tonight I am tired from another round of chemo and I am dreading all the meds I must consume this week. On the other hand, being an optimist at heart, I am happy to take them because they have kept me well.

There are times that I may not feel well and fear tries to creep in andtell me I am getting sick again. I suppose that`s a normal reaction, one that I do not dwell on.

So, today is just a mixture of all kinds of thoughts and emotions.

Tomorrow I start back to work. I`ve been on vacation since Oct 14th. A nice break. Part time is nice.

My daughter calls me the other night in tears. She spilled juice on her new Mac laptop and now it won`t turn on. We`re praying that after it dries out a few days it will work okay. I know other people who have done this without ruining their computers. Corey does her homework on it and has the software that`s made specifically for Macs. She was pretty upset and so was I.

I made an AIM page last night. Had fun doing it. It`s not much different from doing a journal. Here`s the link:


Okay, I`m off to watch dog the Bounty Hunter.




Sunday, October 22, 2006

Music And Stuff


Thanks to Missie for this tag. Isn`t it the cutest?

I received an update about the young man who was robbed. He was shot in the head and the bullet is lodged in his brain. It is too dangerous to have it removed. He will be taking meds and getting scans done, but the doctors feel he should be able to lead a normal life. Is this amazing or what? Please keep praying. Obviously this is a very scary and harrowing situation.

I had asked a few entries back if anyone knew how to put music in a journal. I must thank  Missy of Missy and the Midgets for sending me all the instructions. I had a few snags along the way, so Phil stepped in with some advice. I STILL couldn`t get it to work, so Jenny vowed to help me until we got it right, even though I was ready to give up. So today I heard the Something Corporate song playing when I loaded my journal. WHOO HOO! Doing the happy dance! Drinks on the house! Now don`t tell me you`re not hearing it or I`ll cry. (Does anyone else hear it or is it me hallucinating??)

Another cold and rainy day in Ohio. I came home after church and basically just hung out, reading and relaxing. Ahhhh, lovin` it.

Have a lovely evening, ghouls and guys!


Saturday, October 21, 2006

Just Received Sad News


I  have a pen pal online who lives in New York that I have been writing to for a few years now. We send each other an email every day or two just to say hi and fill each other in on what`s new. I have come to think of her as a dear friend, although we have never met.

She has a beautiful daughter in her 20`s who is a newlywed. Last night this young woman and her new husband were held up and robbed on a street corner. The young husband tackled one of the 3 thugs who were robbing them, as he thought one was about to fire a shot and he wanted to protect his wife. As they wrestled, the gun went off twice and this young, innocent man was shot in the head. It may be too risky to operate. He is coherent and it`s a kind of  a wait-and-see diagnosis at this point.

This is so sad, so needless. If you could please say a prayer for him it would mean so much.

It`s a cool, but sunny and nice day here in Ohio. I went to Walmart earlier to pick up some groceries. Then I vacuumed out my car and washed it, which it desperately needed after the road trip. I also bought nice silver frames for my license plates. A nice finishing touch. It`s already due for the first oil change. Geesh!

I have things to do around the house and I feel like doing none of it. We did get the lawn mowed and I took a leaf blower to the driveway and patio. Looks good.

I hope you`re all having a good weekend.


Thursday, October 19, 2006

Cold & Rainy


It`s a cold and rainy night here in Ohio. Temps are at 46 degrees.

It`s hard for me to believe that it`s Friday already, that my vacation is almost over. I do have Monday off as well - and Tuesday.

On Tuesday I will be going to the Cleveland Clinic for one of my last remaining leukemia treatments. ( Only a few more to go! It`s been 19 months. ) I get bloodwork done from the port that is bulit into my chest. ( It`s not visible. ) Then I see my handsome doctors, then I have a small dose of chemo. Then I have a week`s worth of medicine >>> That`s what makes me feel blah. All the hospital stays and long hours of chemo are over, thank God.

When I was diagnosed and went into the hospital in March of 2005 I was absolutely terrified. I felt if I died, okay, I was ready. I know and love the Lord. So spiritually I wasn`t scared, but I sure didn`t want to go just yet! I wanted to live to see my daughter finish college, get married, have children...... These were my thoughts.

It was actually a relief to be in the hospital for the month that I was. I was too sick, too weak to do anything. I could barely stand. Food made me nauseous. I lost 25 pounds. My hair fell out. I had to give in and get my head shaved. You don`t have much vanity when you`re a patient on a cancer ward. That`s when my faith really took over, I think. I held onto my dignity through faith and prayer. The heartfelt prayers of so many lifted me up and I can honestly say, for the most part, I always felt hopeful.

I know I harped on this a few times in my old journal, but it`s so important. Donate blood if you can! It saves lives! If you have a loved one going through cancer, just be there for them. Finances are a concern, as are children, laundry, preparing food ( once the appetite comes back ), errands.... A card or a gift can so brighten the day of someone who`s laying in a hospital bed. Magazines, a special snack, new slippers. And don`t worry, it`s not catching. Hugs work wonders!

I am so thankful to be alive and well today.

Every day is a gift.

Okay, moving along......

( You thought this entry was finished, didn`t you?  No such luck! Ha. )

I want to thank everyone who was responsible for this nomination:

I am truly honored. There are so many great journals out there! No matter who you vote for, please just have fun with it. Read some new journals, make some new friends. Like any award contests, there are many who aren`t nominated that may be just as good. I love being part of J-Land.  :0)

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone!

Thanks, Chris - love the name tag!

Wednesday, October 18, 2006




I have Chris to thank for this darling tag. :0)

Today has been busy even though I haven`t even left the house! I have been hanging some new prints that I bought, ( Van Gogh, Renoir ), cleaning, doing laundry, and making some crafts. I took a few pictures and I have to say that I am disappointed in them. I still think I am not setting my camera properly to get enough details. Oh well.

This is the silk purse I bought with the Chinese design:

My SIL and I were making pillows while I was in Indy. I don`t have them sewn shut just yet and I still need to add buttons and ribbons to them, but I love how they turned out and the fabric I chose.

So easy to make! Another thing I have been doing is buying Mason jars and decorating them with ribbon. I use them for pen holders, bathroom stuff, etc. Very simple but I like how it looks:

This one on the left just has a purple ribbon around it and is filled with q-tips. The slender glass bud vase in the back looks very pretty when you see it live. I filled it with colorful glass stones and put the faux flower in it. The dish filled with cotton balls is heart shaped and the purple and pink candles are some that I bought while on vacation. I just re-did my bathroom in those two colors.

This is a lamp that I bought at Cracker Barrell some time ago. Isn`t it adorable? Love their stuff. Next to it is a glass dish I bought at Walmart for like a dollar. Then I put a pink votive candle in it and some colored glass stones. I could also decorate the top by tying a ribbon around it. Covering the table is a blue and white pin-striped fabric. 

Next is a little experiment I did, which is just a small glass dish with a pink votive candle in it and the colored glass stones again. Then I wrapped a beaded necklace that I liked around it for a bit of flair.

Just some fun, inexpensive crafts I though I`d share.

Church starts at 7, so I should get moving along.





Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Back From Indianapolis


I`m happy to say that my daughter, Corey, and I had a wonderful time in Indy. We did lots of shopping and visited a few nice restaurants along the way as well.

I bought a silk purse from a little Chinese lady who had a booth inside the mall in downtown Indy. Very cute. My daughter wanted to go to a store there called H&M. My brother and SIL have a very nice place about 7 miles outside of Indianapolis. I liked it there. It`s a nice city. Pretty and clean.

On the way home we stopped at a candle outlet. I bought some beautiful purple and pink candles and also the one in the above picture, although I did have some trouble fitting that one into my car!

The one thing I would have liked to do that I didn`t was to go to the Indiana Museum of Art. We planned on going Sunday afternoon, but I think several days in a row of being so busy and traveling and taking the leukemia meds wore me down. So I slept a few hours and it did wonders for me. Next time I`ll go.

I took more pictures, but they were just okay. I hope to get some good ones this week while I am off work, so we`ll see. Today was a cool, rainy day in Ohio.

I`ve read a couple books in the last few weeks that I wanted to comment on. One is The Last Time They Met by Anita Shreve. Not a spectacular book in itself, but the very last paragraph.....the last sentence, really blew me away. The whole book wasn`t what you thought it was at all! The other is by Jodi Picoult. I can`t remember the exact title but it had salem Falls in it. Again, the book was okay, nothing over the top, but again.... the last sentence made me cringe. Didn`t see it coming at all.

Now I am reading The Englisher by the Christian author, Beverly Lewis. She writes fictional stories about the Amish while trying to stay true to representing their lifestyles as they are. This book is the 6th in a series. Good, clean reading, which is a nice change from a lot of what`s out there.

Good luck with the VIVI Awards. I know

Jackie and Chris are working hard to accurately count all of our votes. Make sure you thank them for all their hard work!

The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you......


Thursday, October 12, 2006

Road Trip

My vacation officially starts tomorrow after work. Yay! :)  I will be picking up my daughter and we are going to Indianapolis. We`ll be visiting my brother and his wife, plus shopping and visiting some restaurants, I`m sure!

Later in the week when I`m back home I will catch up on everyone`s journals. If I haven`t been around to yours lately, I will be!

Good luck to all with the VIVI`s.

Hugs and God bless,


 I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference

                                 - robert frost

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Overcast Tuesday


Since it was my day off, I thought I`d go out and take some pictures with my new digital camera. Mostly I was experimenting and playing around with the settings. It was a very overcast day with temps lingering in the high 60`s. Most of my pictures I ended up deleting because I didn`t like them, but there are a few that I kept that you will see in this entry, beginning with the one at the top.


The leaves have started to turn somewhat, but are nowhere near the vibrant colors of autumn yet.


So anyhow, this is my bits and pieces of Ohio for today.

If anyone knows how I can put music to my journal, would you please email me and tell me how? Thanks.

I`m off to check on brownies that I have in the oven.  :)

Good night and thank you, my dear Chris, for the oh so darling name tag!



Saturday, October 7, 2006

Cyclone, Still Spinning



Did you ever see a cartoon where the character goes into this dizzying cyclone spin? That`s how I`ve felt for the last 3 days. lol  Thursday I picked up Corey from college and brought her home and it was non stop from then on.

I visited her and her roommate, took them a jack-o-pail full of Halloween candy, mugs, and spooky socks.   :)

Friday Corey and I and one of her girlfriends went to the mall. Corey has lost 20 pounds, so she was needing some new jeans. ( Lookin` pretty good, girl! )  Not much luck at the mall, but she did find some at Old Navy. I, on the other hand, came out of the mall with a rather large bag of goodies from Sears. I got some great deals and bought 2 shirts and 3 sweaters! Then it was lunch at Friendly`s, a trip to the doctor, grocery shopping, a quick stop home so she could pack her things and her new fancy schmancy Mac laptop, then a 2-hr drive back to her school, then 2 hours for me to drive back to my house. Then up at 7am today for work. Then I took my mom out for lunch and to run errands.    Can we say tired?

The picture at the top I took today of my Mandy, who I call Manda-Lynne. Aside from a little drool on my car windows ( which I took Windex to when we returned home ), she was a good girl.

It was a beautiful day for a puppy to take a ride.

Love and God bless,

Thanks, Toni!

Wednesday, October 4, 2006

Feeling Good


This will come as no surprise to those of you who know me - I am confused by this internet stuff. ( I can hear Chris snickering all the way from PA. )

I now have high speed internet, so I ditched AOL, but I still can have AOL because it`s free. But I had to sign on to it through Internet Explorer and the main screen was different - not so user friendly. Then this evening my "old" AOL sign on screen comes back on and it`s back to how it always was. Favorite places.... buddy list..... all that stuff is back again. Hmmmmm...... 

Well, I have 2 days off now, so I am happy. Tomorrow I`ll be going to get my daughter. We already have lunch planned at the Olive Garden. Yummo.

One thing I hate to shop for is jeans. If I find a pair that looks great, I feel like I am being cut in half at the waist. If I find a pair that`s comfy, the legs are baggy. I have one very favorite pair that is getting thread worn in spots. So off I go to Fashion Bug the other day to look for jeans and try some on. You ladies know how it is ( or you guys who have the unfortunate job of standing there waiting for your girl to try on clothes. ) I take the first pile of clothes in.  ( Had to grab some shirts along the way, too. ) First shirt, too tight. Second shirt, too big. Jeans, face turns blue, can`t breathe. Next jeans, too baggy, (would look great if I were a gangster rapper.) On and on it goes. Mind you, I am taking medication - steroids - so my face starts to get hot. Then it turns beat red. I`m not giving up. I must be a glutton for punishment because after trying on several things that don`t fit, I get dressed in my own clothes and go back out into the store to grab another dozen of things to try that most likely won`t fit either. LOL! To make a long story short, I did find one awesome pair of jeans and also a pair of black dress pants for work. Buy one get one for $1. So I was happy. Hot, aggravated, and grumpy - but happy nonetheless.

Today I felt really good. Work went well. Cooler temps tomorrow. Yay!

So I`m off to read more journals while I can still find them all before my internet changes again. :0)

Thanks, Chris, for the great tag!


Tuesday, October 3, 2006

High Speed And I Hope This Works!


It sure is nice having high speed internet again. I don`t know HOW I went without it for so long! I took the free AOL deal, which is nice, but I`m finding it a bit confusing. I guess I will get used to it. I have become such a creature of habit.

One of my doctors mistakenly told me that my maintenance treatment for leukemia was finished. Not so! I still have 6 more months to go. It`s really not bad, but the steroids that I have to take 5 days a month weird me out. I have not felt too great the past few days because of it, but that`s over now for another month. All in all, it takes a total of 2 years of treatments - at least for the kind I have. The first 6 months were extremely difficult - very, very sick. The next 6 months were manageable, and then after that I felt and looked fine, for the most part.

I`m taking a little trip on Thursday to pick up my daughter from college. We will do some shopping and she has a doctor`s appointment. Then the next weekend we will do our road trip to Indianapolis to visit my brother and his wife. I have a week off. I hope to get some nice pictures of autumn here in the midwest. Another week or two and the colors should be spectacular.

Have a great night. Thank you so much for the beautiful tag, Missie!!